Today's events and prayer requests

Why is it that weekends home are never restful. Next time I come home I am going to do just that...STAY HOME at least a little more. (That is when I am home in South GA). When I come home it always seems I am so busy I am searching for time to hang w/ all the people that want time with me but never am able to get to everyone in a manner which will satisfy them all. However, every time I do come home I always make time for Papa and Granny. Granny hasn't been doing the best lately and sometimes it seems that Papa is content to follow suit. Mom keeps me posted on how they're both doing on a regular basis when I'm not home and from reports, G-ma has been sleeping so heavily lately that sometimes they can't wake her up. Her vital signs and everything will be ok but she becomes so exhausted that when they try to wake her they are unable to. This really worries me b/c she is usually such a light sleeper. She also hasn't been eating like she should either, sometimes only what would amount to 1 meal a day. I was also told by mom and several other ppl as well as some of the nurses that she hasn't been smiling much lately. Any of you who know my g-ma know that's not like her. So on my visit today I was determined to not only get a smile but a laugh as well. I am proud to report that w/ some pickin' and teasing and some help from some DQ soft serve I was not only able to get a smile and a laugh but she also ate something. What can I say, I'm the baby grandchild on that side, I have my charm.

As usual Papa and I had our regular conversations about different things that are going on and such. Today was a bit different though. The conversation went something like this:

Pa: So what happened to your computer repairman?

Me: Who?

Pa: You know, your computer repair man.

Me: Oh, you mean R.? (Papa always comes up w/ nicknames for everyone. I have about 7.)

Mom: They aren't dating anymore. They broke up when she moved to Athens back in Aug.

Pa: Oh ya did? hum....can't say as I blame him. It's hard to have a relationship so far away from each other.

Me: This is true (Papa doesn't know the real reason we broke up and I don't feel the need to tell them b/c they always liked R. and wouldn't have it any other way).

Pa: Well let me give you my advice about it. You need to un-break. If you don't he's liable to find some other girl and marry her.

Me: Well Pa, if he does I guess it just wasn't meant to be. I'll just have to be ok with it at that point.

OK, so my grandfather is worried. I get it. I know why. He and I have had this conversation many times. He doesn't want me to end up a spinster. He's already afraid that my brother will be a forever bachelor and he doesn't want me to end up living alone for the rest of my like and not having children and so forth. He also knows that I want him to be one of the officiants at my wedding and he knows that he's not going to be here forever and he wants to be there for that as much as I want him here for it. I get it and I could have told him why I wasn't dating R. anymore and I know he'd have understood and would have agreed w/ the decision I made to end it. I know this b/c I have heard him council others before in situations. He and I have even talked about it before w/ another guy that I have dated. But I couldn't tell him that R. had done that. It just didn't seem right. So R., when you read this, just know that my family still thinks of you.

When leaving my visit w/ Granny and Pa I often stop into several other ppl's rooms as well. Some of them I met in my many trips to the nursing home while others I have known all my life. I usually stop in to see W.'s g-ma b/c I have known her all my life but she also happens to be 2 rooms down from Papa and Granny and in a room w/ another woman that I have grown very fond of as well, Mrs. E. Mrs. E. always wants to know when my mom and I are going to come back and sing again. Mom and I try to go to the nursing home and sing when we can, and we generally have a relatively large audience. I told her I would try my best to set something up the week of my spring break while I was home. So guys, help me remme, the week of March 13th I have to sing at the nursing home (come join if you'd like) in addition to going and talking to my mom's school about deaf awareness and Deaf Culture. So this paragraph is just basically a reminder for me for later.

When I left the nursing home I went to my nephew's B-day party. As always children are always a joy to be around and help you forget the heavy burdens on your mind. And I swear that kid has almost every Thomas the Train thing they make. LOL. When I left there I went to B.'s house. While I was there we talked about a few things. I went to check and see if R. had posted on his blog and she said he hadn't b/c she had already checked it. I asked her if she had posted on her's and she shook her head 'no' so I didn't bother checking. When I got home I jumped online for a few minutes to check on a few things and possibly post before bed myself. While I was online I checked R.'s site for myself and found that he had posted but it had only been w/in the past few hours. No biggie right. The thing is that in reading his I found that my best friend from elementary school, S., had basically gone 2 faced on me and stabbed me in the back. How you ask....

Fri. night I went to a party at her house and brought B. w/ me. After the party we talked about some things and I asked J. (S.'s husband) how R. was doing (he works w/ R.). J. said R. was doing fine as far as he knew and we discussed the situation a little. J. told me that he thought that I was doing the right thing but it was going to obviously hurt R. for a while but he really was the right thing to do for the better of things in the long run. S. agreed w/ him. However, S. apparently went up to R's work today and told him that I was wrong and that she didn't agree w/ me and that she thought that I was going wild and it was all b/c of B. Good to know who your true friends are huh? That bridesmaid list just keeps getting smaller and smaller.

Shortly after read all this R. gets online and I shoot him a line explaining that I was indeed going to talk to him on the phone about everything but he read the blog before he called which was something I wasn't expecting him to do so the actual conversation was never had and that I was sorry about all that. We talked for a few mins and he said that the post from today was spawned off of the post that B. had made. *Ok...wait....now didn't B. tell me earlier w/ that shake of the head that she had not posted today* so I went and read B's blog. Apparently she was pissed at me as well. ARGH. So I went to comment on B's blog and it wouldn't allow me to post. So who knows. It's all drama. I guess I will talk to her about it at church tomorrow.

When it rains it storms.

I do think that the conversation w/ R. was a positive one. I think now he sees where I am coming from. I don't want to do him like my X, JR, did me. That wouldn't be fair. At least now I hope he has a better understanding. I know that things will be hard for him for a long time, they were for me when I went through it, but I think in the long run it will be for the better. And who knows, in a while after things have settled and he's been able to let go and get back into the groove of things we will be able to chat regularly again and it not be a problem. I look forward to that day b/c I miss talking to him as well but I know it has to be done. I just don't want to drag him through the mud like JR did me. But then again, I've said that already. I just hope that one day he'll understand.

So, I was supposed to talk to W. tonight but that still hasn't been able to happen. I did talk to him around 9:30ish and he said he was still at work. I know he was b/c you could hear it in the background. I told him to text me when he got off and I would call him back if I was at home. He texted me at 1:30 and said he was still at work that he would call me tomorrow or something. He knows now what is on my mind and what I want to know, so I will hopefully know what's up soon. His work hours are sometimes insane. He works as long as the shipments are coming into port. Just depends on when and if they harvest that day. Apparently they were busy at the fields today which makes them busy at the ports. Keeps them "balls to the wall" as he so poetically puts it. Oh well, I'll wait. Not like I have much else to do anyway. Besides, when he calls tomorrow I'll probably be driving home and I always welcome a call at that point. The road can be such a boring place at times.

Well I guess I should be off now. It's almost 2:30am and I have to get up for church tomorrow...or would that be today. Oh well, guess I'll just have to take a short nap tomorrow. Be well all and don't forget to say your prayers before bed. With the way things have been going lately, I think we all need them.