Hospitals, Headaches, and The Savior of Subway - AMEN!

I find myself more appreciative of Austin every day.  Naturally Austin brings a perspective of life that only comes with a dog. The boy has become an actively integrated part of our lives.  It's amazing how much at ease I am just because I know he's there.  I realize that, should something happen, there's no a lot Austin can do but he can help R. by making sure that no additional harm comes to him from others.  Austin becomes more and more affectionate the longer he's with us and even has times when he actively seeks it out.  He is comfortable enough now that he requires the leash less and less when venturing out to "park" and knows to stay by R's side even when the neighbor's cat sits taunting in the window.

A few weeks ago R. had kidney stones break loose and start moving about 1am.  It being the middle of the week, I was long ago to bed and hitting the REM state pretty hard.  When it moved R. was on the floor in so much pain his yelling was reduced to a whisper that I was unable to hear over the fans in our bedroom.  Austin came out from under his table, where he naps until R. goes to bed, to check it out and see if R. was just playing opossum or if something was going on.  Realizing that something wasn't right he began running between the bedroom and R.  R. crawled down the hall in hopes of waking me up, Austin continued to run between us nudging me each time and whining and going back to check on R.  Austin was what woke me up, but I saw him going back out the door and thought that R. had called to him to take him out.  Then, when he came back again and roused me, I woke up and moved to look over the edge of the bed at him but didn't see him, that's when I heard a whimper in the hallway and looked up to see R. on the floor.  Who knows how long it would have taken to wake me up if not for Austin.  The look of concern on Austin face was obvious and as we were quickly getting things in order to go to the ER R. said we could just leave him at home. "It's not like I can really walk and use him while we're there," he stated.  I laughed and pointed at Austin, "Do you really think I could in good conscious leave him here knowing how worried he obviously is and not knowing how long we'll be gone? No, I'm grabbing his harness and lunchbox and he's going with us."  Austin was perfect at the hospital and likewise the hospital was welcoming and accommodating.  St. Mary's Hospital here in Athens was familiar with the protocol for service animals and a nurse was kind enough to even bring Austin a blanket so he wouldn't have to lay on the cold floor.  We did however, figure out that we need to have an emergency pack ready for Austin in case of another ER visit.  Austin was so worried that he started trying to gnaw on the blanket they provided for him at the hospital.  After he was reprimanded several times for it he began chewing his nails.  So Austin now has his own emergency pack that includes a chew toy.  Hope we never have to use it, but it's here just in case. 

There are those who may be confused by the fact that R was willing to leave Austin at home.  What some people don't realize is that Austin is very much like a child. He gets restless, he gets excited, he gets tired and ill so there are times that it's just better and/or easier to leave him home. I wasn't willing to do that because in this instance I could see that Austin was as worried and scared as I was and I knew I wouldn't want to sit at home and wait anymore than he did.  But there are times that it's better for him and or R. for him to hang back.  It helps R. make sure he keeps his cane skills intact and sometimes to make sure Austin gets his rest as well.  There are many reasons someone may leave their guide dogs at home, but it doesn't mean that the guide dog is any less useful or unnecessary.  If we are going somewhere R. is familiar with, or where he knows he's going to just be hanging out not doing much, and/or won't be back until late, it's sometimes best to leave Austin at home to rest and/or be less of a distraction.

For example, this past weekend R. went to hang out with his brother, who lives w/ his mom, late one night after dinner. We knew we wouldn't be back until 12-1 am and it was a place R. knew well enough that even I could walk around blindfolded, so in this instance, assistance wasn't needed.

But there are also times that we do things that are wholly for Austin.  We are firm believers that Austin helps take care of us and brings us laughter daily, so we make sure that he gets pampered on occasion and has a good time when he can.  Austin had a couple of new fun experiences last weekend that were all about him. On Friday he had his first experience riding in a convertible. He thoroughly enjoyed it. So we figured we'd give him a chance at riding in the back of a truck. He LOVED it. After church Sunday, before our yearly family gathering, my dad took him for his first ride. When they got back to the house and Austin saw me it was like he was trying to tell me about his ride. He ran up to me dancing, turning circles, and running back and forth like a maniac between R. and me as if to say "OMG it was amazing and awesome, come on R. tell her!" I just laughed asking, "Well did you have fun?" to which he responded by jumping up and running circles around me. I'd call that an absolute yes he had an amazing time. So we got him to settle down but knew that after so much excitement getting him to lay still under a table in a room of 30+ strangers, large quantities of food, some of which may fall on the floor, would be a job that diminished the ability to visit with family we only see once a year. The family gathering was also held at the church we have attended since before we married and in which we were married. I'd classify it as a familiar place. So again we left Austin home to simply enjoy the afterglow of his adventure.

Now understand, thanks to my profession, I read body language so well that people often think I understand foreign languages or have an acute ability to read lips.  But because of this I can tell almost all I need to know about a person by how they respond to R. and Austin. This past week has been a lesson on quite a few people. As usual some of my thoughts may or may not prick a few nerves, and I may or may not be referring to you, but as I've often said, if something I say bothers you, weather I'm talking about you or not, you are the one that should ask yourself why it bothered you in the first place and what you've done to make you feel guilty.  But I digress...

Most of the family wanted to know where "the baby" was while it seemed a few took an accusatory tone that Austin wasn't with us like maybe R. isn't blind enough. R. has so far held his tongue but good grief, he did manage for a year and a half without even the use the white cane and nearly 2 years without Austin. I understand that maybe some just don't know, but I'm a firm believer in the concept of 'if you don't know then politely ask' and believe me we will be glad to educate. But there is no need to be rude. Austin is an asset to both R. and me, but blind people have been successful and independent for years before dogs were used as guides. The dogs that become guides/leaders are a blessing and an asset to any family who uses them, however they are not a requirement. There will always be places that a person who is blind or low visioned prefers to go without using their guide. There will always be things they do where they'd prefer to leave their partner home, either for their partner's benefit or their own. There are even places that, even though guide dogs are allowed, many will not bring them out of respect (i.e. a tour of a food factory or something of the sort). But for Pete's sake don't take an accusatory tone about my husband and Austin just because you're ignorant and/or uneducated. Lord knows we've seen plenty of that this week....but I'll get to that soon enough.

Wednesday R. took Austin out to the tennis courts behind our apartments for a romp and park as usual and the two were on their way back home when R. had another of his knee dropping headaches.  As R. dropped to the ground Austin stepped behind R. leaning on his back to help support and prop him up so he wouldn't be laying on the ground.  R. said he sat there for about 10 minutes on the grass behind the apartment, propped up on, or with, Austin before he was able to get to his feet again.  When I got home from work Austin was as usual excited to see me but was more persistent to rub up against me and play to a point that I eventually just sat in the floor.  Instead of jumping up on me, as he typically would, he rubbed up against me and laid between my legs just wanting to be rubbed on for a few minutes.  He got back up to grab a toy to play for a minute but before long he was back sitting in my lap, something he's never done before.  I mentioned to R. that it was unusual and that's when he told me what happened. Austin was looking for a bit of comfort.  He was worried about R and this time instead of biting his nails he was seeking solace and I was only too happy to give him all the attention he needed at that point.  Not that he doesn't get it anyway. 

It always seems however, that all the really crazy things happen when I'm not around.  Although admittedly it's probably for the best.  Yesterday, R decided he wanted Subway for dinner so he and Austin walked over to buy a sandwich.  Once he arrived there was a line to the door so he and Austin found their place in line to wait.  The very large woman in front of him, who managed to have somehow acquired Joseph's amazing techno colored dream coat paired with gold lipstick and hoops the size of 20"s, apparently didn't approve of having a dog of any sort in such a fine dining establishment.  After R. and Austin had stalked her through the line has it moved forward she finally had enough and turned to face the offenders and proceeded to tell R. that he needed to take that mutt out of there because animals weren't allowed in food related businesses.  Robby pointed out that the mutt she was referring to was a service animal and allowed into any establishment that he was allowed into.  If you know R. you know it takes a lot to get a rile out of him but she continued to verbally bash R. and Austin until finally he retorted with a few slurs of his own.  At that point, she called the attention of the police officer who just happened to be in line, "Hey, Mr. Popo!  You need to come get this man and his damn mutt and get them out of this restaurant."

The officer apparently gave her a look that implied she was obviously an idiot that even R. could make it out on his face, and from his place in line simply stated, "Ma'am, I obviously can't do that.  This dog is obviously a service animal and by law is allowed into this and any other establishment that he wishes."

"Well if you aren't going to do anything about it, then I'll just remove the mutt myself!"  At this point this Amazonian throwback proceeded to grab the lower part of Austin's leash where it attaches at the slip collar and attempt to drag him to the door, essentially choking him. 

R. popped her hand which she quickly removed stepping back and before he could get a word out the officer had stepped over and said, "Ma'am you just assaulted the dog, which is an assault against this man. Sir, would you like to press charges?"

The woman gaped in disbelief as R. responded, "No Sir, but I will ask that she be removed from the premises," at which point the officer did just that, informing the woman that she wasn't allowed back at any point in the foreseeable future.  Afterward the officer apologized to R. for the "interruption of your day," and went back to his place in line.  Needless to say I'd have pressed charges and then some.  Like I said, maybe it's a good thing I wasn't there after all. 

On a positive family note though, LG is coming around. It's nice to know I don't have to categorize him with the "Savior of Subway."  He still doesn't' have a full understanding of it all but he's asking questions and gaining a better understanding of just what Austin does for us. We obviously still find those who are condescending and just can't fathom. I'd pray they eventually gain understanding but the last few people I've prayed that for ended up having to experience something similar in order to understand and I wouldn't wish anyone the struggle and burdens it would take for them to understand what it's like to need a dog in your life so I'll just pray, "Lord, help'em 'cause you know what they need more than I do. But until they can be more considerate Lord, please help to limit my required socialization time with such ignorance. AMEN!

Note: For all those keeping tabs, we will be going to Mayo Clinic in a few weeks for tests in an attempt to figure out what's causing the headaches.  Keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we travel and that the doctors will find answers.  It will be another adventure for Austin I am sure as he is very aware of what a hospital/doctors office is and is in no way a fan.  Thanks in advance! _\m/

AUSTIN - He's My Hero

Submitted to: http://www.ruledbypaws.ca/2012/06/assistance-dog-blog-carnival-call-for-submissions/      for blog carnival.

I will be the first to admit that I never expected it to be this way. I didn't expect to be so attached to an animal. I mean, come on, I grew up w/ dogs all my life. I raised them from puppies and spent restless summer afternoons running in the dirt and sun w/ them, cried when they died, and attempted to make sure they had a proper burial. They were well loved, well fed, cared for and spoiled - But they were pets. They were dogs.

But, AUSTIN is NOT a dog. AUSTIN is not a pet. AUSTIN works every day and has earned his place in my home, the food in his bowl, and the bed, pillow, and blanket in which he slumbers. AUSTIN is the partner of one RCY. Together they are a team, and together they can go anywhere. That alone means so much. B/c of AUSTIN, R. has freedom and mobility again that he didn't have with the white cane. B/c of AUSTIN I have a little more peace of mind when I am not with R. B/c of AUSTIN, R. wasn't hit by a van 2 weeks ago. B/c of Austin, R. makes it home safely w/o a scratch every time he ventures out. AUSTIN was the one who curled up on the floor next to R., scared and worried when he passed out on the floor, while I was at work and none the wiser. AUSTIN takes care of my man when I can't. AUSTIN is an extension of my husband and is therefore, an extension of me.

I didn't realize the impact AUSTIN had on both R. and I until this past weekend. This weekend my oldest brother got married. Those of you who know LG know how he is, and for those of you who don't just understand that in many ways he is grossly uninformed but absolutely comfortable with that.

As is customary at weddings we were all getting ready to take a family picture. As R. and I are walking up, my brother informed me he didn't want "the dog" in the picture. To this I just look and Mom and said, "What!?" To which my mom restated, "He doesn't want Austin in the picture." Once I picked my jaw up, I was livid to the point of tears. But since it was his wedding day I gave him what he wanted. I held it together long enough to inform R., who was likewise appalled, make sure that AUSTIN was in the hands of a trusted friend, and take the necessary photos before I walked out and broke down out of anger, embarrassment, and disgust that my brother could be so insensitive (though admittedly knowing him I should know better). I realize that he may not be informed and educated on the etiquette of what it means to have a guide dog. But to R. and me, it was like telling an amputee that you wanted them in your picture but they couldn't wear their prosthetic. We felt like LG was saying, yea you're family but I'm ashamed that you're blind. It was at that point that R. and I both realized just exactly what AUSTIN meant to us both, which for me was a shocker.

I knew that it would be a huge impact to our lives. I knew that having a Leader Dog would not be like having a normal dog and that it would come to mean so much more. But I wasn't expecting this type of reaction from myself, especially after so short a time.

So to all friends and family, you should know - AUSTIN is a member of our family. To deny AUSTIN is to deny us. If AUSTIN is with us, which he usually is, and you want to take a picture; AUSTIN will be in it or you'll just have to take the picture from waist up or crop him out yourself. From here on out, I don't care if it's your wedding or not, that's how it will be. If you don't like it, don't invite us. That's just how I see it.

Service animals aren't pets, they are partners w/ the person for whom they service and are valuable beyond measure. Service animals and their humans are a team and together they are both empowered. Remember that next time you see someone w/ a service animal. I'd be willing to bet, that service animal is as valuable to them as any person in their life. So consider that before you try to separate them for any reason, even if it is just for a picture.

I love my brother, but I am yet to see him put on a harness and guide my husband around all day to make sure he doesn't trip on a curb, run into a wall, or get hit by a car. AUSTIN on the other hand....well, he's my HERO.

I TOTALLY Understand How She Feels...

Funny thing is - that's usually exactly what happens.  I wanna come up out of my seat and R. is pullin' me back and telling me it's alright.  Normal life in a not so normal family.  lol.

Not Just Any 'Ole Dog...

Those of you who keep tabs are probably aware that this is the month that R. has been gone for his Leader Dog (LD) training.  He will return on the 27th (7 more sleeps) with our "new addition," Austin.  Austin is a 55 pound, 1.5 year old, yellow lab (pictured above) that was born April 15, 2010, which means he's a "tax baby."  R. has been in Michigan with him training for the last month so I haven't even gotten to meet him yet.  I will admit I'm excited about meeting this dog but above all I'm ready to have R. back home.  Needless to say I've missed him.  I am sure having a dog in the house is going to take some getting used to but like everything else I am sure I'll take it in stride and adjust in time. 

I am sure I will have stories of frustration as I adapt since I have never had a pet in the house before.  I grew up where animals were outside.  They had their accommodations but those were outside on the porch or in the barn and they weren't allowed in to dirty the house, Daddy and the boys did enough of that w/o adding an animal in the mix.  I have always rolled my eyes at people who said their dogs were like their children and come to the conclusion that they had either never had children or had neglected those they did have, feeling that if my mother have equivocated me to a dog I'd truly be insulted. 

I don't have children of my own yet, but I did nanny 2 boys for 5 years and can't imagine how the love for a child could equal to the love for a dog.  I know I have friends that this will apply to, and don't take it the wrong way or be offended, that's just the way I've always seen it, no disrespect.  But I say this knowing that I will, and already, have more respect for Austin than I have ever had for any of my pets. 

I have had some amazing dogs in my time.  Butch was the mighty protector, well behaved, and minded those he loved, and defended his truck (which he darn near killed for) like he would his owners.  Bossom was the honorable well trained bird dog that could do some amazing tricks and loved anyone that offered a scratch, pat, or honeybun.  Casper was a big 60 pound baby that hated to ride in the back of a truck but loved to ride in the front and thought I was Mama and he was my lap dog (you can imagine what a site that was).  Pudge had the might of an army and respected those who could command him, was as bouncy as any puppy with those who couldn't, and always blazed a trail around the farm for R. and I to make sure we got where we were going b/c he knew there would be a treat at the end.  But none of my amazing animals contributed anything more than a feeling of security and/or joy and pleasure of companionship to my daily life.  Which is important and wonderful in and of itself, but Austin has already proved that he will be a contributing member of the household and he's not even here yet.  He's not just a pet or a dog, he's a LEADER, he is an extension of my husband, a guide, protector from curbs, obstacles, cars, idiots, and mean spirited people, a saving grace, and his eyes.  His presence means more freedom and mobility for R. and less worry for me.  Amazing how one animal can be so many things.  I can't say that I will ever love him like I would a child but I can honestly say that I already see him much differently than I have any other animal I've ever cared for, and he will always have a special place in our lives that nothing and no one can replace.  I still have my concerns and reservations but I fell like those will be easy to get over with all things considered.   

But to my friends who see their dogs as their children.  Just remember when or if you have children, they may not be ok with you saying that the dog is also your child.  My prospective would be, "Jeez, I know I'm a bitch, but that doesn't mean I'm a dog."  Like the header says: It may not be what you want to hear, but it is my point of view.

Canada, Ohio, And All The Detours In Between

I realize it's been a while since I've posted but it's been a bit busy on this end of things. The summer was quite eventful to say the least. We went up to Canada to visit a few friends and had a blast. Did a little geocaching while we were there and just generally thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. It was very laid back and I got to see my boys that aren't so little any more.

After Canada we headed down to Ohio to visit family there.  Had a blast.  Again, very low key, no stress, kick back, relax, and enjoy ourselves and some good company kind of time.  Did a little more geocaching and found a few interesting things and places that we might not have otherwise found. 

I also got to introduce 3 members of the family to geocaching as well and they just loved it. 

So the day before we were to leave coming back home we were out caching and we went to search in a location that we suspected a cache to be.  While going down for a closer look I fell and broke my ankle extending the trip an additional week. 

Didn't exactly turn out the way we had hoped but we had fun anyway.  Being there an extra week meant that we got to be there for our niece's birthday so it was all good.

So even though our trip had a bump or two along the way, we enjoyed ourselves and those that were around us immensely. 

We've become quite accustomed to life's detours, which we have come to see as the scenic route.  This summer we also learned it is apparently no different when it comes to having children for us.  So it's going to be a while before you see such an announcement, but when we are finally blessed, it will allow us to cherish the experience that much more. 

Love, God

Below is an email I recieved from a friend that I wanted to share.  It surely put a smile on my face and a tear to my eyes.  How inspiring.


We don't know who replied, but there is a beautiful soul working in the dead letter office of the US postal service.

Our 14-year-old dog Abbey died last month. The day after she passed away my 4-year-old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her. I told her that I thought we could so, and she dictated these words:

                                
Dear God,


Will you please take care of my dog? She died yesterday and is with you in heaven. I miss her very much. I am happy that you let me have her as my dog even though she got sick. I hope you will play with her. She likes to swim and play with balls. I am sending a picture of her so when you see her you will know that she is my dog. I really miss her.


Love,
Meredith

We put the letter in an envelope with a picture of Abbey and Meredith and addressed it to God/Heaven. We put our return address on it. Then Meredith pasted several stamps on the front of the envelope because she said it would take lots of stamps to get the letter all the way to heaven. That afternoon she dropped it into the letter box at the post office. A few days later, she asked if God had gotten the letter yet. I told her that I thought He had.

Yesterday, there was a package wrapped in gold paper on our front porch addressed, 'To Meredith' in an unfamiliar hand. Meredith opened it. Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers called, 'When a Pet Dies.' Taped to the inside front cover was the letter we had written to God in its opened envelope.  On the opposite page was the picture of Abbey & Meredith and this note:


Dear Meredith,

Abbey arrived safely in heaven. Having the picture was a big help and I recognized her right away. Abbey isn't sick anymore. Her spirit is here with me just like it stays in your heart. Abbey loved being your dog. Since we don't need our bodies in heaven, I don't have any pockets to keep your picture in so I am sending it back to you in this little book for you to keep and have something to remember Abbey by. Thank you for the beautiful letter and thank your mother for helping you write it and sending it to me. What a wonderful mother you have. I picked her especially for you. I send my blessings every day and remember that I love you very much.  By the way, I'm easy to find. I am wherever there is love.

Love,
God

Processing My Grief and Giving Thanks:

Today I found myself regularly returning to my computer screen to check my FB.  Addict you say?  Obsessed with FB you ask?  Bored with nothing else to do you assume?  All would be incorrect.  I found my mind constantly in prayer and thinking about the Shively family.  I kept returning hoping to catch the next update come across the screen.  Tears sprang to my eyes with empathy and understanding that can only be felt by someone who who has experienced sitting in the hospital not knowing what's wrong w/ your significant other and knowing that if they don't figure it out soon you might be returning home alone.  Today I was reminded of just how fortunate I was.  Sadly, my cousin Amanda wasn't as fortunate.  Today, she is forced to leave the bedside she has vigilantly sat beside and made to return home to explain things to her 2 young children and a huge void.  Her only hope is that Albie's organs are fit for donation.  Indeed a show of strength, bravery, and worthy of so much respect (as if those who know her didn't already know that).

So today, once again, I say thank you.  Thank you to a nurse cousin willing to do a little research and share the possibilities.  Thank you to an ER doctor willing to listen and take a harmless but life saving chance that it could be something so small as vitamins that could be easily replenished but would take days to late to get the lab results to prove it.  Thank you to nurses willing to listen and accept no when offering meds prescribed by an idiot doctor that had they been taken could have possibly put us right back in the same position for which we started.  Thank you to family and friends that supported us from day one.  Thank you to family and friends that continue to support us, offering help, assistance, a ride, an ear, or just simply a visit on occasion.  Thank you to family and friends who laugh with us about it all, even when those around us don't think it the least bit funny. 

Before finding out the extent of the problems Albie was having, I shot Amanda an email.  I cried writing it, I cry reading it, and I had no idea when I wrote it what would be coming.  It just reaffirms that God uses us sometimes, even when we don't realize it. 

  "...I know you're going crazy right now and getting sick of hearing everyone saying the same 'ole words but at the same time grateful you have the support of those around you. Just know that it doesn't matter how comforting the words or the people that it's ok to shed the tears and cry out to God. It's even ok to ask why. (as I'm sure you have many times already) But know that we all feel that way at some point and it's my opinion that God understands that too, so don't feel too guilty about it. Just keep the hope and faith that whatever God's will, is the same as our hope. But keep the faith that no matter what His will may be, He will carry you through to great blessings. I know it doesn't seem like it now and you may even roll your eyes a little at my words. But Robby and I are a living testament of that. It's a trial that I wouldn't wish on anyone but one that we have learned much from. I'm sincerely sorry that someone else in my family has to experience a similar trial and wish you only the same abundance of blessings to come. So it is with tear filled eyes that I write you with understanding, empathy, love, and above all else prayers. Know that we are here if you need us. Don't hesitate to call. We love you all."

Writing this I had no idea that Albie would be called home.  At the time I had hope, as we all had, that he would again pull through and live to ride the four-wheelers once more with his precious boys.  I had no clue that my words would ring so true and had hoped that it would only be applied to surviving the sterile walls of yet another hospital.  Unfortunately, my assumptions were very wrong.   

I am truthful when saying that through all the trials and losses, Robby and I have been greatly blessed.  God has shown his light in our lives and provided us the comfort of security that can only be found in Him.  So it is my sincere prayer that Amanda and her family find the peace, abundance of blessings, and faith in Christ through all of this so that they may once again know, feel, and experience joy in their lives on a daily basis. Thank you to those that have prayed, are praying, and will pray for the Shively family.   Please continue to lift them up in your prayers while realizing that it is true what they say: "Tomorrow is not promised us and today is a gift, that's why they call it the present."

Thank You Lord For You Blessings On Me!!!